Pakistani ladies are still reeling from Sara Shahnawaz\’s recent murder. Women are at the mercy of men regarding the \”luxury\” of feeling safe. It always has been. Even if we are instructed to dress appropriately and conceal our bodies, guys nevertheless manage to make our lives miserable. Do you understand the reason? Because they, not we, are the issue. They have been the issue forever.
What\’s even more upsetting? That men who are a part of the inner circle commit such heinous actions. An old acquaintance murdered Noor Mukadam, her ex-husband shot Sania Khan, and a classmate stabbed Naira Ashraf. These violent men committed their crimes because \”ghusse pe qaboo nahi reha.\”
You expect me to calm down when a man\’s \”bad temper\” threatens my safety? When a friend, cousin, or uncle is holding a woman by the waist. Do you still have the gall to tell her that she is thinking too much? Do you want to inform them that \”tough love\” is the definition of an abusive husband?
Ask The Therapist: ”My parents have fixed my marriage with my cousin without my consent
‘Wahan gayi kyu thi,’ ‘You must’ve lead him on,’ ‘Aese kapre kyu pehne they,’ ‘Itni raat ko bahar ker kya rehi thi,’ ‘Shaadi main aesi oonch neech tou chalti rehti hain.’ How many more of these excuses can you come up with? How does your conscience allow you to contribute to women’s years-long suffering? I bet you cannot think of one scenario where NOBODY, absolutely NOBODY blamed the victims, and no it’s just the men, women point fingers too. The misogyny is so deeply root in the system, it would take centuries for us to detangle it and make some progress.
But open your eyes and see the pattern for the sake of God. Women\’s lives are more vital than your \”bro code,\” and our cries for assistance should be hear more than your \”locker room chatter.\” The first step, which is not at all difficult, is to change your perspective and actively support the women around you. Try it once.
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